As 2013 comes to an end

The year started and just whizzed by, not even giving me a few moments to pause and ponder. What did I do new this year? Nothing remarkable…. started several things and left them midway…

Lost one of my best friends to cancer and there is nothing and no one to fill that void. Miss you so much, Old Man, and I am sure I am not the only one. Atul, you meant much more to me than I ever admitted.

It is still difficult for me to believe that Atul is no longer going to be a comforting online presence; even as I struggle to accept that he is not there, another friend, who was just getting close  after several years of not being in communication had a fatal fall. You were a beautiful person, Kavita I wish we had more time to know you closely. I will always miss that friendship that never blossomed completely.

Just after Christmas, I got one more blow.  A man who was larger than life itself passed away. A well wisher, and an extremely talented actor, Farouque Saheb was one of the most down to earth person I have ever interacted with. I will miss his occasional phone calls and messages…

Life has its own ways… and while I am alive, I  must live my life to its fullest and on my own terms. People who are gone would not wish any less, I am sure, because each one of them lived their life on their own terms.

2013 also saw Aasim turn 16, an important milestone in his life; he gave his IGCSE this year and is growing up to become a fine man. I feel proud to be his mother. Next year he will be away from home, staying in a hostel for continuation of his education. Though as parents we feel we have equipped him to be on his own, somewhere there is a string that tugs… I guess that will always be there. It’s an emotional bond and I wish it stays that way.

Things changed a bit on work front, we  have a talented and much stronger team and a few products to be proud of. SANIsoft is embarking on new growth path and we are determined to take it to new heights.

I don’t know what 2014 will bring, as I write this I remember a very old and beloved friend who loved to say and sing Que Sera Sera… whatever will be will be, the future’s not ours to see.


ऐ नये साल

January 1, 2012: Reflections.

ऐ नये साल बता, तुझ में नयापन क्या है
हर तरफ ख़ल्क ने क्यों शोर मचा रखा है

रौशनी दिन की वही, तारों भरी रात वही
आज हमको नज़र आती है हर बात वही

आसमां बदला है अफसोस, ना बदली है जमीं
एक हिन्दसे का बदलना कोई जिद्दत तो नहीं

अगले बरसों की तरह होंगे करीने तेरे
किसे मालूम नहीं बारह महीने तेरे

जनवरी, फरवरी और मार्च में पड़ेगी सर्दी
और अप्रैल, मई, जून में होवेगी गर्मी

तेरे मान-दहार में कुछ खोएगा कुछ पाएगा
अपनी मय्यत बसर करके चला जाएगा

तू नया है तो दिखा सुबह नयी, शाम नई
वरना इन आंखों ने देखे हैं नए साल कई

बेसबब देते हैं क्यों लोग मुबारक बादें
गालिबन भूल गए वक्त की कडवी यादें

तेरी आमद से घटी उमर जहां में सभी की
फैज नयी लिखी है यह नज्म निराले ढब की

— फैज़ अहमद फैज़*

* The book Saare Sukhan Hamare (complete works of Faiz) that I have does not list this ghazal. However, at several independent places on the net I found this ghazal attributed to Faiz Ahmed Faiz. Comments/views on this invited.

खल्क – दुनिया
हिदस: – गणित (count, number)
जिद्दत – नयी बात (novelty)
करीन: – ढ़ंग
मान-दहार – समय (time period)
ग़ालिबन – शायद
आमद – आने से